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buttcramps:

is there anything weirder than waking up after a dream and all the details are still fresh in your mind so you’re just like what the FUCK WAS THAT WHY DID I THINK THAT WAS NORMAL HOW DID DREAM ME NOT QUESTION THAT

slomps:

slomps:

slomps:

Apparently if you saw yourself in person, you wouldn’t recognise yourself

So my biggest question is, WHAT THE FUCK do I look like

And do I look hot

julianocasabranca:

FUN STORY: my grandma lives in a city that was currently taken over by drug dealers and gangs and it’s now divided in two and my grandma is the oNLY CITIZEN IN THE WHOLE CITY who can go walking freely through both sides of the town because she used to do community work and feed the poor kids and those gang members were all fed by her so they let her come and go as she wants SO WHAT WE LEARN TODAY IS TO BE FUCKING NICE TO KIDS BC U MIGHT BE DEALING W FUTURE GANG MEMBERS

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"what the fffffffffffffffheck"
— me trying to be more family friendly (via gnarly)

(Source: pfghhh)

presidentgay:

me: *doesn’t start hw until 10 pm*

me: *at 10:15 pm* i am dROWNing in sCHOOL work why do teachers do this to me I hATE THis cruel WORLD look at all of THE iNJUSTICE 

"He does something to me, that boy. Every time. It’s his only detriment. He steps on my heart. He makes me cry."
— Markus Zusak, The Book Thief (via icy-brunette)

(Source: in-finitus)

literallyrad:

there are approximately 1,013,913 words in the english language but i could never string any of them together to explain how much i want to hit you with a chair.

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