I hate when a person says they’ve had a bad day and everyone, instead of trying to cheer them up, enters a competition of who’s had the shittest life
I like to hangout with people that make me forget to look at my phone
if you’re going to ignore my texts you might as well change my contact name to terms and condition
you only realise how bad the jokes on this site are until you actually say one out loud
- bae: come over
- me: do you have food
- bae: my parents aren't home
- me: are they coming back with food
after your first time having sex
tell me a secret
One time during class my drama/english teacher, who’s a devout vegan and all about not killing animals, accidentally stepped on a ladybug. He froze up and slowly cradles it in his hand and he was so heartbroken and started quoting Hamlet.
I didn’t have the heart to tell him that it was a red m&m.
I can’t breathe